The Dog Days of Summer Beards

After 65 days of growth my beard, particularly in the neck region, is getting pretty scraggly and is slogging through the dog days of summer. Our crew has moved on to our last work site and we have only two weeks left. My beard was extremely spoiled last week and will continue to be, as our crew is staying at The Cabin, a quasi-operational hiker hostel. We have a shower, cable TV, a refrigerator, a microwave, and most importantly, beds. These are normal amenities for most people, very abnormal for my beard at this point in its life. This is my beard sitting in the doorway of a tepee we put up in the yard outside The Cabin. My beard was thoroughly impressed with the simple and subtle construction of a tepee.


This is my beard in action swinging a Polaski to chop up some roots, thus slowly killing the adjacent tree.


This is my beard at the overlook on our hike to and from our work site. Please note the sun and blue sky; my beard has been enjoying some nice consistent summer weather.


This is my beard laying on the perfect water bar. A water bar is a diagonal rock wall that diverts water from the trail and prevents erosion. Usually rocks, soil, roots, weather, and bugs work against the formation of anything this exquisite, making this particular creation worthy of my beard's admiration.


This is one of the guest beards of the week, Evan. Evan is from New York and enjoys long distance running, reading fine literature, drinking good beer, and getting buff. Evan is working for MCC for six months, unlike most of us three-monthers, and is hopefully working for the Peace Corps afterwards. Please note a beardless Nate in the kitchen admiring Evans beard; Nate shaves.
The second, but equally impressive, guest beard of the week is Mike. Mike is from Rhode Island and enjoys hardcore outdoor adventures, sheep, singing lewd rap songs, and rocking out. Mike does trim his beard, but we don't hold that against him.

Quotes of the week:

"Well I don't want to play with Abe Lincoln anyway." - A feisty local yokel at the basketball court we play at. My beard declined his attempts to join our 2 on 2 game, as well as his attempt to start a 4 on 4 game involving his girlfriend/wife and child. He was not wearing shoes and had to be dragged away by said girlfriend/wife.


"When it comes to fuckin' around, he don't." - Rob, talking about any of us at our most hardcore.


This week my beard is feeling:

Giddy

Mile High Beard Club

My beard has reached 58 days of growth, but there is no photographic evidence to confirm this. However, due to my procrastination and a lack of Internet strength here at the sheep farm I failed to display my beard after 51 days of growth. After hitting the half-century mark my beard hiked Katahdin, the highest Mountain in Maine and the beginning of the Appalachian Trail in Maine. Katahdin stands 5267 feet high, lacking the 13 essential feet to officially be called a Mountain by the powers that decide these things. There is a structure at the summit that makes up those 13 feet, which means my beard officially hiked a vertical mile.

This is my beard in front of a rock painting outside of Baxter Park. My beard has not encountered a bear in Maine, nor has anyone else, and hopefully it stays that way. It doesn't stop us from talking about bears eating people in tents on a weekly basis.


This is my beard at 7 am before hiking the mountain that you see in the background. My beard woke up at the unholy hour of 4:45 am to hike this beast.


This is my beard at the summit of Katahdin after four hours of hiking, with another three to go. Enough said.


This is my beard after playing some One-on-One basketball, and receiving an unfortunate head to the bridge of my nose. I defeated a beardless John Meyers, definitively proving that beards rule and non-beards drool.



These two pictures violate Rule #1 of the yet-to-be-written SummerofBeard Manifesto stating that all pictures must feature a close-up of a beard. However, it is my blog, and climbing trees and Rob to set up the tarp is one of my favorite work activities.


The guest beard this week is Allan. Allan is from Massachusettes and a Harvard man. Allan was a volunteer with us for four weeks, meaning he spent a month growing this beard and doing trailwork without getting our meager living allowance. Allan enjoys eating cereal, as you can see, writing, and playing the occasional game of basketball.


Quotes of the week:
"Man is born to die, his works are short-lived. Buildings crumble, monuments decay, wealth vanishes. But Katahdin in all its glory, forever shall remain the Mountain of the People of Maine." - Percival P. Baxter, Governor of Maine 1921-1924, for whom the State Park is named

"I don't get this whole lukewarm thing. Who is this guy Luke? And why is he so mediocre? And if he's so mediocre, how'd he get to be so famous?" - Rob

"Grip it, rip it, shred it, tear it, kill it. If not, then drivah (aka driver) - Rob, talking about anything requiring force, or anything at all really.

This week my beard is feeling:
One step closer to 30

Sunny Beard!

After 44 days of growth my beard saw the sun in Maine for the first time since it was four weeks old. I may be exaggerating, but Thursday and Friday were the first consecutive sunny days since May. Rejoice! After a short week of trail work my beard took to the paintball fields for the first time ever, with battle scars to prove it.

This is my beard in an admittedly staged photo opportunity with paintball paint all over my beard; I was not shot in the beard. And it's not really paint, apparently it's a non-toxic soap concoction.

This is my beard after three hours of paintball. Please note the third nipple.

This is my beard holding the king piece to a strange Norwegian lawn game called Kuub, which involves throwing wooden batons to knock over wooden blocks. My beard is consistently a winner at Kuub and is considering joining a professional Kuub league in Norway, if such a thing exists.

The guest beard of the week is one Michael Ferry. Michael is from Indiana, and went to school at Marquette, making our beards bitter sports rivals. Michael enjoys reading poetry, cooking, and trying to keep up with his fantasy baseball team while working in the middle of nowhere. Michael currently has a fancy trimmed beard because he recently had a goatee, a poor choice that he realized soon after growing it.

Quotes of the week:

"The word for this site will be deliberacy." - Rob, talking about our new work site, which is about as steep as it gets as. We are operating at a 2:1 ratio of rocks found to rocks lost rolling down the mountain taking out everything in their path. Note: deliberacy is not a word.

"'So I went to get into bed with my boots on and she asked me why I had my boots on, so I said, if I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die with my boots on.'" - Rob retelling an anecdote his father told him about his sex-life.

"Seemingly inanimate objects are actually bristling with spite. Don't let them fool you." - Rob, discussing the tarp we use to cover our eating area, specifically how it always manages to dump excess rain water on our heads.

This week my beard is feeling:

Exulted

Small Beard, Big City

After 37 days of growth my beard took to New York City for a short dip back into the real world of computers, cellphones, and people.  There were mountains, yes, but mountains of buildings, and even bigger mountains of people on top of people.  My beard even overheard 47 different foreign language conversations in one day.  What follows is a small snapshot of my beard wandering through the masses.  

This is my beard in Brooklyn overlooking downtown Manhattan and the Brooklyn Bridge.  

This is my beard outside of the Trump International Hotel and Tower in Columbus Circle.  It wasn't as impressive as you might think, Donald Trump being Donald Trump and all.  

This is my beard after watching the hilarious new Woody Allen comedy Whatever Works.  Larry David is at his finest in this new film, and my beard strongly recommends you see it.  Note:  Larry David may be larger than this movie poster suggests.

This is my beard at Belvedere Castle in Central Park.  The Castle doubles as a weather hub and birding hotspot.    

This is my beard, with sunglasses, in Central Park.

 
This is the guest beard of the week, my tentmate Aaron.  Aaron is from Ohio, enjoys gardening, learning about beekeeping, quoting any number of movies and songs, and both chewing on and baking with rhubarb. 

Quotes of the Week:

Guy on street in Brooklyn at 2 am:  "How you doing?"

Me:  "Ok."

Guy on street in Brooklyn at 2 am:  "Wanna buy a camera?"

"That'll work won't it.  You can do it can't you?" - My team leader Rob, every day, 7 times a day

"We'll put that in our pocket and save it for later." - Rob, discussing rocks that don't quite work

This week my beard is feeling:

Unusually Civilized